Friday, July 27, 2012

A year ago

It was a year ago on Sunday when we held our precious Caleb Leykun for the first time.

                          I remember the anticipation and wondering what it would be like.

It was more joyful then I could have ever imagined and it was more painful then I ever could have imagine.

There were a group of us in a room waiting for the nannies to bring us our kiddos. One of the men was peeking out the window and yelled that  a little baby was coming. We didn't think it was ours, because from all the pictures Caleb was huge. So when Hermela walked in with him we were not prepared. I saw the baby in her arms and yelled, "He's ours, that's our boy!"  What an amazing feeling. To finally hug and kiss your child that God has placed on your heart, the child you have been praying over for over a year. It was our boy and we could not be more ecstatic!

One thing that I really wanted to bring was an album for Caleb to keep with him while we were gone. I knew he was young, but it meant so much to me for him to see that he had a family waiting desperately for him to come home.

                     Look at the bald head!!!  This is Caleb looking at the album we left with him.

Caleb still loves that album. He grabs it all the time when I am going to read to him and he tells me who everyone is in the pictures. He points out hubby and I and his brothers and sisters. It melts my heart.

He loves to pose for the camera.. haha!!

I remember leaving him. It was one of the hardest things I have ever done. On the last day of being with him there was a group of us and only a small few could fit into the van and we thankfully got to leave last. It was just hubby and I and all the kiddos. I cried my eyes out and didn't stop that whole day. Having to lay him in the crib and walk away tore my heart out. 

I have a lot of friends who are going through that now. I know that pain. It is indescribable and the not knowing of when you can go get him is the worst, BUT going through that experience has caused me to trust the Lord in a whole new way. I got to see God first hand do mighty things and I honestly wouldn't change it for anything. Even though it took 4 very long months after this point to get him here. I still would not change it. God's timing is/was perfect! I could not say that during it, but I can look back and see His hand in every single thing we went through.

For this child I prayed and the Lord has granted me

                           Oh my sweet boy!!! He can suck you in with that cuteness!!!


Don't forget about my mission trip fundraiser. We are slowly getting there, but I need your help!!!!  God has so much planned for us and I can not wait!

Pray!!   Pray!!   Buy a T-Shirt!!   Donate!!  Pray!!

Blessed beyond measure,

Tuesday, July 24, 2012


What a crazy month it has been! I can't believe July is almost over. This weekend we just moved our family of seven. Now I really know what stress is ;)

As you all know my heart is in Ethiopia. My mission trip is fast approaching and I  am way behind in funds. I have managed to sell some things to add little by little to my total, but I really need to get these funds in. Our group leader has come up with a way for us all to sell shirts. I am so excited about these and can not wait to wear mine!

The wording on the shirt says "Fiker" in Amharic. It means love! How awesome is that!?! What a conversation started.  "Love the Lord your God with all your heart!" "Love your neighbor"  "I love Ethiopia" "Whatever you do, do it in Love" "Go and Be Love!"
Love, Love, Love! I think your getting my point!    :D

All you have to do is use my paypal to the right. Shirts are $20 plus $5 shipping. If I can hand deliver it to you, I would LOVE to do it!

The shirts sizes are as follows:

Unisex = typical mens sizing (true to size for men, a size big for women)
Women's Fitted = Fitted womens T (runs a size small, order a size up from what you normally wear)

    Kids = XS (2-4), S (4-6), M (6-8), L (8-10)

When you Paypal me. Make sure you put in the special instructions: Shirt color, (Red, Green, or Yellow) and which size. Please email me if you have any questions!!

These are a PRE ORDER. So you have only 2 WEEKS to order and then the shirts will ship in 4 weeks!

Thank you so much for helping me go on my mission trip to Ethiopia!

Would you help me spread my blog? You never know who may be interested!


**If you don't want a shirt and would like to donate to my mission trip. You can also do that through the paypal as well. $5 adds up quick and I would be so grateful!**


Monday, July 2, 2012

Set Apart?

Last weekend a group of ladies and I went to the Gospel Coalition in Orlando. I can't even begin to explain how that weekend and being immersed in Gods word non stop affected me in a good painful way.

I had the pleasure of hearing so many wonderful speakers. One of whom was Elyse Fitzpatrick. I have read her book "Give them Grace" which is amazing and I agreed with so much of what it said, but after putting down the book nothing changed.
 Don't you hate that!?! When you read an incredible book by someone who loves the Lord more then you can comprehend and you tell people how it "wrecked you" and how it "changed you." Really?? How did it change you? Did it change you just until you picked up another book or maybe it changed you just long enough to write a cool FB status. I'm not bashing anyone, in fact I am talking about myself.  Change has to come from within. We Christians know that right?? Or do we?

 Elyse posed this question at the beginning of her talk.... "Is there any difference by the way you parent verses those that don't have the Gospel? and would your own children even be able to see the difference?"

That question wrecked me.. I had to truly ask myself if my kids think that outwardly obedience means that God loves them. Am I parenting that way? The question would be yes, I am.

Everyone raises their kids to be moral and good.(well, most people)  The problem with that is we can't do anything good. Not one thing. I know that, I even disciple adults and tell them that and point to how Jesus says that and yet, I don't tell my kids that.  I tell them to use manners and share your toys and don't fight with your brother. We should give things and money away, we need to help those that can't help themselves...........

  Let me just stop there because WE can't help ourselves.

That is why Jesus had to die. We need Him!!!

I want my kids hearts to change! I pray for it daily. I pray that the Lord would grab a hold of them and truly break them. Let them see Him, let them taste Him and know that He is good. But my prayers are not matching up to how I am parenting.  I am not taking what they are throwing at me or taking what I am seeing them do and bring it back to the cross.

God spoke to me so clearly about this issue. I can't bring them back to the cross... But He can! Am I diving into His word?  Am I allowing it to change me to overflow to those around me?, because you can't spend time with Jesus and not be changed. Not books about Jesus, but His word! His living powerful word!

When I came home and had time to allow some of the many things I wrote down to sink in, I began to share with my hubby and then I had a talk with my kids. All of them, even Caleb (though he was playing with his car) I apologized to them for teaching them to think that if you are good (or at least look like you are good) on the outside that Jesus would love you. Or "That makes Jesus happy."  I explained all that I was feeling. I didn't care if they only understood half. I wanted to not water down the Gospel because they are kids.  (We don't give them enough credit.)  We all had a great talk and my oldest said they knew that apart from Jesus nothing mattered. I believe that was the Lord reminding me that He has this! I just get in the way;)

I can't dish out what I don't do myself. So many times I think "If I just do this" "if I can just keep my mouth shut" If..... I am His daughter, whom He chose before the creation of the world. He has redeemed me and sees me as if I all ready obeyed..... How encouraging is that? If you are His, HE SEES YOU AS IF YOU ALL READY OBEYED!  Thank you Jesus.

"Let us then with confidence draw near to the throne of grace, that we may receive mercy and find grace to help in time of need" Hebrews4:16

Draw from the living waters, drink and never thirst again. He died so we could!!

Thankful for Grace, upon Grace, Upon Grace,