Faithful unto death.......

"Be faithful unto death and I will give you the crown of life." 
                                                          Revelation 2:10


My hubby is a police officer and is also on SWAT. I get asked all the time if I am always worried for him. The answer is, No. Worry is not from God. I can count on one hand how many times I have been comsumed by fear or worry about him not coming home. That doesn't mean that I am not constantly praying for his and other police officers safety though.

Very close to our department, we had two more Police Officers lose their life to a man with a gun. Though their deaths are horribly tragic there is something beautiful that has come from it. One of the officers was a man devoted to God. His whole family was. I did not know this man personally, so you may be wondering how I know. His wife went on a secular radio station a day after his death and brought glory to our King. You can listen to this wonderful testimony here (grab a tissue) She even says how this was her husbands destiny, that Jesus was calling him to die that day and how she was jealous that her husband was with Jesus. She also said that even though she doesn't like it, this is why she married him, so that she could glorify the Lord in his death. WOW! Is all I can say.

I wonder how I would react if my hubby's life was taken, or even my precious children.. I wonder if my faith is as strong as it is suppose to be. We say all the time that we want to lay down our lives for the Lord, but do we really mean it? Would we be faithful unto death?

Gods word tells us we are suppose to love Him more then these... These can be anything, do you love Jesus more then your husband? your kids? your animals? your job?  Here's the convicting part, not just a little bit more,  infinitely more then anything.

I love what it says in Obadiah, "If thieves came to you, if plunderers came by night- How have you been destroyed!"  It doesn't matter what is taken from us, we have Jesus. But by the way we live our lives you would think otherwise.

We live in a free country. A country where we can read our bibles and proclaim His name without fear of death, yet we don't. Why? because we don't love Jesus more then these.  We should be like Jeremiah, a prophet who was mocked for his Faith.  He never realized how bad his trials would get, but he says "If I say I will not mention Him or speak in His name, there is in my heart as it were a burning fire shut up in my bones, and I am weary with holding it in and I can not."  Did he stop preaching the Gospel? No, He wanted to, but he was in Christ and he couldn't. He would have physical pain, like fire in bones if he were to stop.
Paul also says, "For necessity is laid upon me. Woe to me if I do not preach the Gospel." (1Corinthians9:16). And for those of you who think you are not suppose to share the Gospel. Christ has paid the penalty of sin by His death, It has been paid for all those who trust in Him.  "He died for all, that those who live might no longer live for themselves but for Him."`(2Corinthians 5:14)


So for my point. Will you be faithful unto death? No matter what this broken world throws at you, will you still proclaim His name? Will you still bring glory to our King? Will you share the Gospel with every single person you come into contact with? You never know whose life will be changed and who will be pulled from death.

One more thing to share. C. Spurgeon wrote this and if this is not your hearts cry or as in Jeremiah, his pain, then you don't love Jesus more then these,


"If sinners will be damned, at least let them leap to hell over our bodies. And if they will perish, let them perish with our arms around their knees, imploring them to stay. If hell must be filled, at least let it be filled in the teeth of our exertions and let not one go there unwarned and unprayed for. Every Christian is either a missionary or an impostor. Have you no wish for others to be saved?"

Who/what do you run too??

   Hubby works a lot and sometimes has a very strange schedule, so when he comes home from work it is a big production around here. All the kiddos will look out the window and yell " Daddy's home!!" then they ask if they can open the front door and they all run outside to see who gets to tackle him first.

Though seeing this everyday melts my heart (and I'm sure my hubby's too) I can't help but wonder........


Do you run to your Heavenly Father? Do you wake up excited at being able to dive into His word? Do you jump at the chance to be able to serve others, to pray for them, to love them like Jesus does?

His word is more to be desired then gold, even the finest gold. Even more sweeter then honey and drippings of the honey comb. (Psalm19:10)


Or for an up to date version........ His word is more to be desired then money, sweeter then TV or Sleep or -------.

Are you staying hungry for the word? Are you sharing it's sweetness with those around you? Are you running to your Heavenly Father every moment of everyday???



  "Whom have I in heaven, but you?
                     There is nothing on earth I desire besides you."
                                                              Psalm73:25

Roller Coaster.... Of Love

Do you remember that song, Roller coaster by the Red Hot Chili Peppers? Roller Coaster of love...Ha Ha, can't seem to get that song out of my head.


This adoption has been, well......... hard. Don't get me wrong it's all completely worth it, but I feel like, especially this last month, like I have been on an emotional roller coaster and I would like to get off now. I JUST WANT MY BOY!!! Yes, I was yelling. It's funny how hard it is at this point, because I know that once I see his precious face, then I am going to feel even more anxiety to hold him, then once we see him, it's going to be even more painful leaving him there til we can come back, so I guess I am just surprised at how hard it is right now,  waiting for a referral.

     I love roller coasters. They are just scary enough to me that it makes it absolutely thrilling to be on one. The longer they are and the less you can see what is ahead of you, the more thrilling they are. The fun thing about roller coasters is that no matter how hard you brace your self or how hard you move your body to either side you are at the mercy of the controller. You are going to go and stop exactly when they say you are. But isn't that what makes roller coasters so fun!?! You just throw your hands in the air and go where it takes you.

At some point in this adoption process I lost my thrill (joy). All I think about all day long is my son. Even though it is good to be in constant prayer for him, I have been praying for my will and not Gods. Our sweet boy has turned into my idol. When God called us on this journey and when we strapped our selves in, we knew we would have absolutely no control over any of it. I wonder why I feel like I am entitled  to control it now. "Sorry Jesus, your timing is not good enough, I know whats best.".... I sometimes picture the ride stopping and I am getting off  running towards our boy with arms stretch out (in slow motion of course) and I swoop him up and take him home. And then we live happily ever after.....  We all know that will not happen.

As I pray (pretty much every hour) that God would help me to wait patiently on  His perfect timing. His response is always the same. "Embrace exactly where I have you."

I am thankful that He is in control, even if my actions and emotions don't seem like it. I know during this time of waiting He is making us into the parents and family that we will need to be to properly love on this sweet child. And I need this time to cling to Jesus more, to depend on only Him more, because when our little one gets here there will be many, many, many times that I will need (should be all the time) to draw my strength, grace and love from Him.

So, even though my momma heart is about to burst, I am letting go and repenting of my actions and feelings....... Well attempting to with the Lords help.......... I have to, want to, need to embrace exactly where I am at. I need to make sure that my kids see me going to the Lord before my patients runs out, so that they will do that as well. (we are experiencing this as a family after all). I need to be enjoying what little date nights and family nights we have now. I need to make sure that I am spending my time in a way that honors the Lord and not me. I need to make sure that my eyes are (every second of every day) focused on the one who is in control.


"Though the fig tree should not blossom,
nor the fruit be on the vines,
the produce of the olive fail
and the fields yield no food.
the flock be cut off from the fold
and there be no herds in the stalls, 
YET I WILL REJOICE IN THE LORD;
I WILL TAKE JOY IN THE GOD OF MY SALVATION."
Habakkuk 3:17-18

Pray for me as I throw my hands in the air and allow the ride to take me where I am meant to go.

Thirty One

Also don't forget to check out our 
                                                                                                             fund raiser. It ends January 15th!!

Thirty One!

No that is not our waiting list number, that number is actually 29. :D

   Have you ever heard of 31?? They sell fantabulous (yes, I'm aware that's not a word, that's how great they are!) gifts that you can also embroider. I have lots of their products and have always been happy with what I ordered. Here is a way that you can get something amazing and still help us bring our son home. Because as you can see that wait list number is dropping and I spoke with our agency today and they are expecting more referrals. Not only that, our number only reflects all those waiting ahead of us, not people who are asking for a boy in our age range so it can be a lot sooner.


Without further ado, Here is how you can help us bring our prince home and you get some cute stuff in return.

  My friend sells Thirty One and she is giving us 20% of all orders back to our adoption!  Now through January 15th if you order through this link - My thirty one  - we'll get the credit and you'll get some great Thirty One items!  PLUS right now their thermal lunch totes are $10 and there is NO limit to how many you buy!  You can get the small lunch totes for $8.50!  Even more savings - personalization on the lunch totes is only $1.50 per item!  Think about birthday gifts, school lunch bags, think about using them as gift bags, teacher gifts, baby shower gifts, the possibilities are endless!  On top of all that savings you are still helping bring our son home with every order!  If you have any questions about ordering EMAIL ME!

We would really appreciate it, if you also spread the word. As you can see it is only for a limited time and every bit helps bring our little man home. We also have some great jewelry that is almost gone. :D

Blessings~